" look i dont want to hurt the local business but they just have to improve i had a horrific time and the meals where not nice at all, bedding was a sack filled with human hair and i got my vocal cords torn out for politely asking for a glass of water. All in all i wouldn't recommend bringing kid and not staying for more that a night. "
15 February 2018
Anynomous
" I sadly had to serve 35 years of hard labor here for spitting on the sidewalk and drawing x's on kim il sungs eyes. The wardens never left me alone and lectured me on kim jong un. They made me say that kim jong un is a god, but Im christian so I couldn't, which got me 2 extra full time unpaid jobs. If I tried to ignore them, they'd grab their bamboo sticks and cane me until I was unconscious. Only people like hillary clinton or kim dong un belong here. "
10 February 2018
Anynomous
" Came across this lovely spot on a delightful cruise down the Ipsok river. When taking pictures some gentlemen pulled us out of our boat, threw our phones away and dragged us into the camp. They manhandled us a bit, but the atmosphere here is lovely: ambient, and such camaraderie. The gentlemen here don't approve when you talk, and may beat you for doing so, and the food is dreary and monotonous - as other guests have mentioned, dinner consists mainly of a delicious rat stew - the rat tastes a little rotten, but overall it is quite nice (if rather thin). Supplies were running a little low, and the guards stopping other people from getting inside were a bit violent, but ultimately they devoted their entire day to a delightfully varied timetable of beating us, shouting at us, and shooting those refusing or unable to take part in the activities here. Definitely a good way to get to know people. "
29 January 2018
Anynomous
" I managed to earn a trip to this establishment by folding a newspaper with some chubby fellow's face on it.
Upon check in, I was thoroughly stripped and de-loused despite the absence of any parasitic insects on me. I am impressed with the staff's dedication to hygiene measures. The bellhop in the khaki-green uniform wrung me from my belongings (He was rather zealous) and took it into a small room with five other similarly dressed bellhops waiting. Jubilant shouts erupted from the room and I must say this is the only establishment thus far with enthusiastic bellhops such as these fellows.
Room was small with no bedding nor mattresses. There is a large hole in the middle thereupon a unique stench wafted through, which affirms my assumption that it is their modest toilet facilities. The room lacked windows, which was probably to keep the guests secure. The door leading to the room was a large metal one with a rectangular flap in the middle of it.
Staff was extremely zealous in carrying out their duties. Twice body massages with nightsticks and whips per day, and occasional prostate massage with blunt, sometimes red-hot, pokers. Exercises consists of mining in the nearby coal mine with entrenching tools, and are a daily affair. I have bought this to the attention of whom I believe to be the manager of this establishment as his work uniform was festooned with service medals of entrenching tools not suitable for mining work. For my valuable information, I was given a diet of the signature dish, jackshit, for a fortnight and the massages increased to thrice daily, which was sometimes administered by the manager himself.
Bath facilities are absent and baths are given by the staff every fortnight via strong fire hose. Meals, consisting of the famous grass soup, are served by the staff, sometimes via a metal bowl with small brown grain deco or directly to the face. Every night there are group reading sessions where other guests of this establishment read out a passage from the works of some higher-up fellow whom name rhymes with "bong". Massages are rewarded to guests whom fall asleep during the session, probably to help them relax after a long exercise at the mines. Strangely enough, those guests are never seen again.
All in all, I would recommend this establishments to any known enemies of the states and political dissidents. The service provided is brutally efficient and as a result of my early check-out and subsequent travel to South Korea via Vietnam through China, the establishment is sending people to welcome me back to longer, perhaps even permanent duration, of massages and exercises. "
12 January 2018
Anynomous
" If you want to have a nice time i suggest this place. All the fun activities include getting shot, getting hanged, getting to eat grass, getting bitten by other inmates for food and finally you and your family will be locked up for the next 3 generations! I really suggest this place. #forcedlabour "
07 January 2018
Anynomous
" Great food, great treatment. The staff is very kind. My family and I plan on staying for three generations. You get a free stay if you pull down a poster of supreme leader Kim Jong-un too! "
15 December 2017
Anynomous
" Great vacation location, it is a very interesting hotel if you like pain and suffering. Overall great services and a great experience. "
14 December 2017
Anynomous
" best honeymoon ever! I loved it SO much, that I didn't want to ever leave! Well, it's not like I could have left anyway! "
03 December 2017
Anynomous
" Fun for the whole family ! ( I’ve heard that the next three generations go for free !) If you want to have the best experience you have to try the mud ! MA MA! yummy ! The servers where a little rude though , when I wouldn’t get in the ceremonial eating cage they starting hurting me , but it’s all part of the experience ! Overall a wonderful experience and I still have 2 limbs ! "
19 October 2017
Anynomous
" Honestly, it was an overall enlightening experience but in the end found it wanting. The water's pH balance seemed a little off as it would sometimes leave what appeared to be melted plastic on the lining of my water bucket. I would only visit again if we do more arts and crafts, I loved when they made us put rocks in circles for 5 days straight. "
13 October 2017
Anynomous
" All good until we heard a scream and a few gunshots on the third night. Woke my mother in law and she complained for the entire night (like most of the trip). Horrible honeymoon! Will return if we get a discount. The rental car we used would not start!
(But in all seriousness, these concentration camps should not exsist in 2017... but unfortunately they do) "
01 October 2017
Anynomous
" The Guys who run Guantanamo Bay could really learn from these guys. Honestly this place really lets you appreciate the little victories in life, like on Thursday when if you have Prayed to the Supreme Leader enough times that week then the guards let you eat grass. And provided you like watching missile launches there's plenty of entertainment. In fact there's a cool lottery where whoever wins gets to ride on the missile during the next test. The only downside is during the winter months we recreate the scene from The Empire Strikes Back where Luke gets in the dead Taunton except the Tauntons are the Disloyal.
11 out of 10 would prayer to the Supreme Leader again. "
12 September 2017
Anynomous
" Not bad! This is better than most camp sites ive ever been to, its free! However the guards are not very nice and sometimes beat people to death and the food portions are not satisfactory. But all in all, its pretty good. "
17 August 2017
Anynomous
" These guys are second to none with torture, beatings, starvation and murder. Make sure you rip any propaganda posters down, give em the finger for five star treatment. "
02 July 2017
Anynomous
" The guards beat me severely. Wouldn't stay here at all! "
Anynomous
" look i dont want to hurt the local business but they just have to improve i had a horrific time and the meals where not nice at all, bedding was a sack filled with human hair and i got my vocal cords torn out for politely asking for a glass of water. All in all i wouldn't recommend bringing kid and not staying for more that a night. "
15 February 2018Anynomous
" I sadly had to serve 35 years of hard labor here for spitting on the sidewalk and drawing x's on kim il sungs eyes. The wardens never left me alone and lectured me on kim jong un. They made me say that kim jong un is a god, but Im christian so I couldn't, which got me 2 extra full time unpaid jobs. If I tried to ignore them, they'd grab their bamboo sticks and cane me until I was unconscious. Only people like hillary clinton or kim dong un belong here. "
10 February 2018Anynomous
" Came across this lovely spot on a delightful cruise down the Ipsok river. When taking pictures some gentlemen pulled us out of our boat, threw our phones away and dragged us into the camp. They manhandled us a bit, but the atmosphere here is lovely: ambient, and such camaraderie. The gentlemen here don't approve when you talk, and may beat you for doing so, and the food is dreary and monotonous - as other guests have mentioned, dinner consists mainly of a delicious rat stew - the rat tastes a little rotten, but overall it is quite nice (if rather thin). Supplies were running a little low, and the guards stopping other people from getting inside were a bit violent, but ultimately they devoted their entire day to a delightfully varied timetable of beating us, shouting at us, and shooting those refusing or unable to take part in the activities here. Definitely a good way to get to know people. "
29 January 2018Anynomous
" I managed to earn a trip to this establishment by folding a newspaper with some chubby fellow's face on it.
12 January 2018Upon check in, I was thoroughly stripped and de-loused despite the absence of any parasitic insects on me. I am impressed with the staff's dedication to hygiene measures. The bellhop in the khaki-green uniform wrung me from my belongings (He was rather zealous) and took it into a small room with five other similarly dressed bellhops waiting. Jubilant shouts erupted from the room and I must say this is the only establishment thus far with enthusiastic bellhops such as these fellows.
Room was small with no bedding nor mattresses. There is a large hole in the middle thereupon a unique stench wafted through, which affirms my assumption that it is their modest toilet facilities. The room lacked windows, which was probably to keep the guests secure. The door leading to the room was a large metal one with a rectangular flap in the middle of it.
Staff was extremely zealous in carrying out their duties. Twice body massages with nightsticks and whips per day, and occasional prostate massage with blunt, sometimes red-hot, pokers. Exercises consists of mining in the nearby coal mine with entrenching tools, and are a daily affair. I have bought this to the attention of whom I believe to be the manager of this establishment as his work uniform was festooned with service medals of entrenching tools not suitable for mining work. For my valuable information, I was given a diet of the signature dish, jackshit, for a fortnight and the massages increased to thrice daily, which was sometimes administered by the manager himself.
Bath facilities are absent and baths are given by the staff every fortnight via strong fire hose. Meals, consisting of the famous grass soup, are served by the staff, sometimes via a metal bowl with small brown grain deco or directly to the face. Every night there are group reading sessions where other guests of this establishment read out a passage from the works of some higher-up fellow whom name rhymes with "bong". Massages are rewarded to guests whom fall asleep during the session, probably to help them relax after a long exercise at the mines. Strangely enough, those guests are never seen again.
All in all, I would recommend this establishments to any known enemies of the states and political dissidents. The service provided is brutally efficient and as a result of my early check-out and subsequent travel to South Korea via Vietnam through China, the establishment is sending people to welcome me back to longer, perhaps even permanent duration, of massages and exercises. "
Anynomous
" If you want to have a nice time i suggest this place. All the fun activities include getting shot, getting hanged, getting to eat grass, getting bitten by other inmates for food and finally you and your family will be locked up for the next 3 generations! I really suggest this place. #forcedlabour "
07 January 2018Anynomous
" Great food, great treatment. The staff is very kind. My family and I plan on staying for three generations. You get a free stay if you pull down a poster of supreme leader Kim Jong-un too! "
15 December 2017Anynomous
" Great vacation location, it is a very interesting hotel if you like pain and suffering. Overall great services and a great experience. "
14 December 2017Anynomous
" best honeymoon ever! I loved it SO much, that I didn't want to ever leave! Well, it's not like I could have left anyway! "
03 December 2017Anynomous
" Fun for the whole family ! ( I’ve heard that the next three generations go for free !) If you want to have the best experience you have to try the mud ! MA MA! yummy ! The servers where a little rude though , when I wouldn’t get in the ceremonial eating cage they starting hurting me , but it’s all part of the experience ! Overall a wonderful experience and I still have 2 limbs ! "
19 October 2017Anynomous
" Honestly, it was an overall enlightening experience but in the end found it wanting. The water's pH balance seemed a little off as it would sometimes leave what appeared to be melted plastic on the lining of my water bucket. I would only visit again if we do more arts and crafts, I loved when they made us put rocks in circles for 5 days straight. "
13 October 2017Anynomous
" All good until we heard a scream and a few gunshots on the third night. Woke my mother in law and she complained for the entire night (like most of the trip). Horrible honeymoon! Will return if we get a discount. The rental car we used would not start!
01 October 2017(But in all seriousness, these concentration camps should not exsist in 2017... but unfortunately they do) "
Anynomous
" The Guys who run Guantanamo Bay could really learn from these guys. Honestly this place really lets you appreciate the little victories in life, like on Thursday when if you have Prayed to the Supreme Leader enough times that week then the guards let you eat grass. And provided you like watching missile launches there's plenty of entertainment. In fact there's a cool lottery where whoever wins gets to ride on the missile during the next test. The only downside is during the winter months we recreate the scene from The Empire Strikes Back where Luke gets in the dead Taunton except the Tauntons are the Disloyal.
12 September 201711 out of 10 would prayer to the Supreme Leader again. "
Anynomous
" Not bad! This is better than most camp sites ive ever been to, its free! However the guards are not very nice and sometimes beat people to death and the food portions are not satisfactory. But all in all, its pretty good. "
17 August 2017Anynomous
" These guys are second to none with torture, beatings, starvation and murder. Make sure you rip any propaganda posters down, give em the finger for five star treatment. "
02 July 2017Anynomous
" The guards beat me severely. Wouldn't stay here at all! "
13 May 2017